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January 14, 2005
Back to school, dealing with the death of a friend & grades....
Well we got back from Ohio early Sunday morning, so that gave the kids nearly 2 full days to get geared up and focused to start back to school and go the second half of the year.
Joshua has been letting his hair grow out, something I never thought I would allow, but he actually looks really handsome (that is when its done properly), and everyone that has seen our family picture says that it makes him look so much older and mature.
Anyway, he has some natural curl, so it really looks cute when it is the right length. A haircut is something he was in desperate need of, so that was at the top of my list of things to get done before school started back on Tuesday the 4th.
I had a few things to return at the store where we get the kids haircut, so I sent JOshua over to sign in, and I took the 3 other children with me to stand in line for returns (unreal that the line was still so hudge after being nearly 2 weeks after Christmas). When I finally got done with returns and went to the Salon, I almost panicked. Joshua was sitting in the stylists chair and there was tons of hair laying on the floor and not a whole lot left on his head. Not really, but there was tons of curls on the floor and the hair left on his head was mainly straight and very short compared to how it had been. I had told Joshua to make sure to wait for the lady that had cut his hair last time, if it meant asking her her name (I forgot it) to write it down, then to do it, but make sure she cut his hair. Well, I guess that went in one ear and out the other. According to Joshua, I didn't say any such thing, and I should have just been there.
I have been trying to give him a little more responsibility and let him be more grown up and not shelter him so much, and look where it gets me, it my fault he let this other lady we have never had before, cut his hair. He told me he told her to just trim it how it was, to cut about an inch of, and for some reason this woman didn't understand the words "trim just how it is" or somthing. Needless to say, Joshua and his hair didn't look anything like he did look when he came in, when he left. To be honest, it made him look like a little boy and a little comical, he looked like the ceasar men in roman times or something. This woman didn't do anything that the other ladies do such as layer or texturizing. Joshua was upset, and I as usual was kicking myself for not just triming his bangs myself and waiting until another time when we had more time to get the full haircut. Hindsite is 20/20.
SO, his first day back to school and he felt miserable about his hair, and even threatened he was not going to go to school with his hair the way it was. I tried to reassure him it would be ok and tried to fix it a little better for him than he had it, but the hair just wouldn't do what it needed to do to look right.
To offset the horrible haircut, and to try to make sure people didn't look at his hair and instead look at his chest, JOshua wore one of the new shirt we got him for Christmas that he really wanted. It is a shirt that says something about what really annoys him and had 3 pictures with animated stickpeople characters doing different things with captions under them saying what it is that annoys him (or something like that anyway) and the final picture says something like and people that read my shirt.
The boys had there bi-monthly ADHD check with DR. M immediately after school, so I had to pick each of the kids up at school to try and make the appts and make it within a half hr of the first appt time, otherwise we would have to reschedule. Anyway, the younger kids were late getting out of the ELEM school, so I was running a little late getting Joshua. He had already started walking towards home when I got to the road of the school. When we got up to him he was just walking kind of slow whith his head hanging down.
As he got in the van he said guess what I learned today. I asked what, and he said one of my friends was killed over the Christmas break.
To be honest, at first I was thinking I wonder who, is this another one of those people Joshua calls a friend when it is merely an acquaintance he sees occassionally at school as they pass in the hall, and he really knows nothing about them other than a name. Joshua seems to call those people friends and I don't see that as fitting the description of a friend.
Anyway, I said oh really, who? He said the boys name, and it didn't register with me who he was talking about, that is until one of his younger sibs said, the boy from your baseball team? At that moment my heart nearly sank to my feet, and I got goosebumps. Oh Lord, how can that be, not Jordan. I had to ask to make sure though, you mean the boy whos parents are teachers?
Joshua confirmed yes. I had to know all the details immediately.
The boys family is from her originally, but they take a ski trip to WV every year after school lets out for the Christmas break.
I guess Jordan was an excellent skier, but evidently the young man that came down the slope behing him wasn't, or just merely lost control, and ran right into or over Jordan, knocking him to the ground causing his head to slam down on the ice of the ski path. Although Jordan had a helmet on, the impact was so hard that it caused brain damage and then brain swelling the Drs couldn't stop and it caused his death. The accident happened Dec 22nd, Jordan had just had his 14th birthday a week and a half prior to that, and he passed away around 1am the morning after Christmas, Dec 26th. I just couldn't even imagine going through such a thing. I have found out that the family donated Jordans organs and they were able to help out 8 people with what was donated. How wonderful! At the funeral I guess the preacher mainly preached to the children that came, and he made sure to tell them all that Jordan had gotten it right at such an early age, and he was right with GOd, that he had devoted his life to serving the Lord and was very proud of it.
This whole loss had been very hard for Joshua to process. Jordan was a member of the middle school baseball team which JOshua was also a member of last spring, and Joshua also had all his core classes with Jordan the first semester and they were even in the same group in one of the classes. Since Joshua was with his father and didn't associate with any of the neighbors when he got back before we left to go to Ohio, JOshua missed everything and he has had no closure.
I have been trying to help JOshua deal with the loss of his friend as well as I can. He has asked some pretty indepth questions about life and death and life after death and about spirits and such, and I have done my best to try and explain in Christian and other terms how things usually happen. For now Joshua seems to be satisfied with the answers I have given him and seems to be handling things pretty well.
He has however decided after learning of Jordans misfortune, his hair cut is not such a big deal, and decided he didn't want me to take him back the following day to get it fixed.
Ok, onto other things...
Grades: Monday (the 10th) reportcards came out for the 2nd 9 weeks. The 2nd nine weeks was over about a week before school let out for break, but report cards just now came out.
Well, Joshua didn't do real well, but he could have done worse.
He ended up with 2 D's for the semester, one the very lowest score to be a D, but a D none the less, and no F's.
Here is the rundown:
Lang Arts 75 9wks 70 sem (D)
Curric Assist Pass
Spanish II 72 9wks(down from a 92) 82 sem (C)and final because he only has it half yr
Algebra I 86 9wks 81 sem (C)
Science 93 9wks 92 sem (B) missed A by one pt.
Soc Stud 85 9wks 80 sem (C)
Art 80 9wks (down from 98 because of an art show one evening that was mandatory but nothing was written in his agenda telling me that and I was sick) 89 sem (B) and final because of only 1/2 yr class because of having to take PE again this yr,PE now required every yr.
So, JOshua ended up with 1-D, 3-C's and 2-B's for the semester grades. As I said, it could have been alot worse, but JOshua should be capable of alot better grades with as high of an IQ that he has. Intelligence wise all grades should be above average, so all B's and above, and only 2 of them are that way, so he needs to get the other 2/3 there, but really only one, the D needs to get up by progress reports, so he is in the clear for baseball.
To top it all off, as if the loss of his friend isn't enough, Joshua's Great Grandmother (My moms mother) whom we have always been close to and just visited with over the holiday when we were up in Ohio and she comes with my mom to visit with us over the summer since we have moved, had a heart attack the first of the week, and is in critical condition. The Dr thought it was minor at first, but later found out she needed to have emergency triple bi-pass surgery. Things have been touch and go with her life since because of complications. So, Joshua is one confussed young man right now. Please everyone keep him in your thoughts and prayers. Also his father and girlfriend is due to have a new son born any day. All that and all the other problems we have been dealing with.
Lord help him!!
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