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Peer Pressure
Teaching Our Children to Be True to Themselves
By Gwen Morrison
Being a kid isn't always easy; as kids get older, it can become more and more difficult for them to find their place. Children are often torn between their parents and their peers. Often, the foundation that was built from an early age will be tested as the older child is faced with new pressures within his peer group.
The influence that our children's friends have on them is not always a negative one. Often it can be the very friends they hang out with that encourage them to make good choices in their developmental years. When entering middle school and high school, children can be introduced to new groups of kids who may be involved with drugs, alcohol or other self-destructive behaviors. If your child has a strong peer group before they are faced with the negative influences, it can make it much easier for them to say "No!"
"My son has never been involved with drugs, drinking or any other activity that I know other kids were at his school," says Christine Long of Toronto, Ontario, Canada. "He is almost 18 years old and has always had a small group of friends that he hung out with. He is also the type of child that had a strong sense of who he was, and he didn't much care if people liked him or not."
Long had to bite her tongue when, at the age of 11, her son started dyeing his hair blonde, got an earring and began wearing baggy-style clothing. "It was then I learned to pick my battles," she says. "He had great friends and was a kind, loving child. He was just experimenting with his identity. As hard as it was, I chose to let him be himself and make his own choices."
Though there are many positive influences surrounding your children, there is also a down side. Pre-adolescents are confronted with situations that will cause them to make some very important decisions. Negative peer pressure can cause great stress for young teens struggling to discover their individuality and gain independence from their parents.