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Home › Articles › Back to School Headquarters › From Middle to High School

From Middle to High School

Help Your Teen Make Connections and Find Success

By Kim Seidel

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Most middle school students transitioning to high school are worried about the three "L's":

  1. Lost and late – "I can't find anything!"
  2. Lunch – where and who to sit with
  3. Locker – finding it and opening it

As parents these may seem like "little things" but to teens, being lost and late, eating lunch and dealing with lockers are "big things" in middle schools, according to Jeff Wolfsberg, a prevention specialist based in Canton, Mass. "The most challenging transition may be from middle school to upper school because of the confluence of changes that are social, emotional, cognitive and physical," he says. "It is also considered a key transitional period as it relates to exposure to drugs and other risky behavior."

Wolfsberg, the best-selling author of the CD, Mom, Have You Ever Tried Drugs?, advises parents to not overreact to the ups and downs of this transition. "Be emotionally supportive by listening and asking follow-up questions about what your child just said to assure them you are tuned in, connected and available, if needed. When they know an adult cares, they'll reach out and ask for help when the time comes. If they know you're not listening, they won't seek support. Who would?"

Following are other suggestions from experts on helping your teenager through the transition to high school.

Remind Them They're Not Alone

Those first-day fears are real for middle schoolers taking the leap to high school. Remind your child that he or she is not alone and that their anxieties are normal, says Dr. Jennifer Brout, a child psychologist in New York City, N.Y. "Tell your child that even if he or she feels anxious that it won't hurt them. Anxiety is a normal human response, and it will pass. Remind your child that nobody will know they're nervous."

To help ease their anxieties, tell your child stories about when you or their sibling went to middle school for the first time. Then reassure them that they are ready for this experience. Remind them of all they've already been through.


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