I'm Homesick and Need Money!

How to Prepare for the Freshman Year

By Lisa Marie Metzler

It seemed like just yesterday your child was anxiously awaiting the first day of kindergarten. With tears welling up, you waved good-byes from the hallway and blew enough kisses to last the next 13 years of school. Now, it's time to let go again, and experienced parents and students have the following advice to help the transition be a little easier for both you and your freshman.

Most parents can count on their freshman calling home at some point during the first few weeks. Jennifer Gilfilian, a mother of two in Homer, N.Y., vividly remembers being very homesick during her freshman year at Michigan State University. "I chose a huge university, because there would be so much to do, but since I was coming from such a small town, it was a really big adjustment," she says. "I would call home, but I didn't want my parents to think I made a mistake, so I didn't make it sound so bad at first, but then I would call and cry and complain."

Gilfilian's parents told her to stick with it, and they listened to her when she called home in tears. Gilfilian says that the "care packages" her mother sent from home really helped alleviate the homesickness, too. "[The care packages] really made me feel a lot better about being so far away," she says.

And while it may be very tempting to want to "rescue" your child and let them come home or quit, it's probably not the right answer. Dr. Bill Seymour, a vice president and dean of students at Maryville College in Tennessee, is also the parent of twin daughters, now in college. "The most important thing a parent can do is to be there for their student," he says.

Your student's freshman year will be like a roller coaster ride. It's important to encourage them that the lows are only temporary and the highs are just around the corner. If you have exhausted all efforts in supporting your student and they still are adamant about coming home, continue to be strong and hold firm. Dr. Seymour suggests to making a "deal" with your student. Tell them they have to stay another week and then you will talk about this issue again. During this time, make sure your student is taking advantage of resources available. All campuses have student life staff and academic advisors. Be comforted in knowing this too shall pass.

Want to see more?

• College Bound: A Timeline for Success
• Getting Prepped for Collegiate Success
• Sharpening Study Skills: How You Can Help Your Child Get Ready for College
• Talk about it!